Men
I had written down some things about what I would like in a man, were I interested in having another relationship, simply because quite a few people had asked me about it. Now, nearly 12 months later, I've found I've thought about it a little more, and changed my mind on some things. My old "men" page can be found here.
I don't believe that I need to be with anyone to be happy. I'm quite happy with my life as it is. But I'm not a man-hater either, and male companionship is a good thing :)
My viewpoint is no longer "two-become-one" - at least not in the sense of losing one's individual identity. I remember back when I was married and people would actually get so used to describing us as "Perry and Raina" that they had trouble remembering my name when I was by myself. That's so incredibly unhealthy. I now believe that everyone needs to work on becoming complete in themselves, and then if they have a relationship, the relationship is a third entity which adds to both people, not takes away anything from them. Anyone that I was with would have to have the same attitude.
I still don't believe anyone is perfect. And I still have some things that are non-negotiable and some preferable, that I would look for in a person I was going to be with. Some things haven't changed:
Non-negotiable:
* Respects me as a person.
* Is faithful. (This is part of respect I guess.)
* not abusive in any way - physically, emotionally, verbally etc.
* Intelligent and well-mannered.
* honest
* Has a good sense of humour
* supports me (in an emotional sense) in my determination to succeed
at my life-path
* likes animals and kids (this says a lot about people)
* likes a good balance of socialising/going out and
having quiet nights in snuggling etc.
* must -love- kissing.
* likes to have fun and isn't serious all the time - likes being spontaneous.
* thinks I'm sexy and beautiful!!!!
Preferable:
* Height! I like men who are taller than me, and I'm 5'9" in old
measurements.
* Someone that is fit (doesn't have to be an athlete, but not a slob
either)
* someone with similar interests as I have, someone who likes going to
the movies, dining out, fine red wine, jazz/blues/music and swimming
and well - the other things about me that are on this website.
* someone that is computer literate.
Things that just don't matter
* money
* looks (within reason) as I do believe beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Last modified 22/08/2004
